One week at a time

So, last week was kind of a come to Jesus meeting for me.  I use stress and sadness (and happy times too) to eat.  Stress/sadness is nervous eating.  Happy times of course is celebratory eating.  I can't win.  I have asked myself over and over "What do you really want?"  "Is it worth it?"  Sometimes I say I want this food, it is worth it - and then I regret it... and sometimes I say no and feel so successful.

This week was incredibly tough.  One of my very best friends has just lost her husband (unexpectedly) and the funeral was over the weekend.  I had been over eating way before this all happened and once I found out I noticed every time I thought about her I would eat.  EAT EAT EAT.

And... as you know I've kept gaining, gaining, gaining!

This past week, I really really tried.  I tried not to over eat, I tried to track and I tried to exercise.  I was mostly successful.  My points were not on point, but they were WAY better than I have been.  It did show on the scale this week and for that I'm happy.

BUT, it was a constant struggle.  I still have a long way to go and I'm no longer in my Weight Watcher honeymoon.  I haven't been for well over a year.  This year has been incredibly tough on me - for some reason I just can't stay on track.

However, I am going to continue to work at this.  Continue on what I feel was a super successful week for me last week - even though it wasn't a huge weight loss.  It's still a success and the scale moved in the right direction.  BECAUSE of me.  BECAUSE of my constant thinking about what I really want.

I'm still in it to win it!  It feels good. I felt way better this week and I am excited to see how I can overcome challenges this week.

I can't wait until I'm Healthfully Ever After!

I'm not giving up!

This is going to be a very long journey for me... I'm not ready to give up.  BUT I need to figure out how to get myself back on track.  It's not really about counting points right now - because I'm not doing that well.  If I just made one small change to eat healthier, I guarantee at this point I'll lose weight.

Don't be sad for me or want to fix me.  Only I can do this for myself, I know that.  I'm at the point where I've almost gone too far, but not quite yet.  I had a setback this week that could not ever be imagined and I deal with things like that with food.  Which does not make me feel good, but it's like a drug and for the moment of time that I'm eating it - I have a sense of euphoria... then guilt.

Please no comments this week - I don't want them.  I know that you are thinking of me, wishing that you could help, etc. etc.  This is me, I need to do it.

I will hang in there, trust me.  I just need to get through this weekend... and keep remembering WHY I started.

I can't wait until I'm Healthfully Ever After.

Hmmm... Make it Happen?

Well I didn't.  I didn't make it happen.  I didn't get to the gym. I didn't do anything really.

I'm not sure what my deal is. I know I'm not going to give up.  BUT I don't know what will get me to kick it in gear.  Perhaps this cool weather we're getting will make me want to get out more?  Eat better?  Not sure, but something has to happen.

The only good news I have is that I didn't gain from last week, I stayed the same.  I guess that's good, but I really need to be losing not staying the same.

You have to eat right and exercise to do that though.  My challenge to myself is to hit that reset button.  I am challenging myself to get into the top 10 of my fitbit friends.  It'll probably take me all week to do it, but I need to make this happen.  I know what I want.  The only way I'm going to get it is by moving more and changing my eating habits.

I want to be Healthfully Ever After!

Make it Happen

"Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen."

~ Michael Jordan

It's time, it's time for me to make it happen.  I'm up.  Up more than I ever thought I'd be.  Why you ask?  Because I'm doing nothing to make it happen.  I'm not counting points, measuring out my food, making good choices, etc. etc. etc.

It's time to make it happen.  Only I can do this for me.

I can't be mad at anyone else but myself.  I can't rely on anyone else but myself.  No one can make the decisions, but me.  I'm accountable, responsible and I can do this.

I will do this!  You'll see.  Next week, you'll see great change from me and my post.

I can't wait until I'm Healthfully Ever After!