Hit it HARD this week

Well, I did what I said I was going to do last week... I'm back on track.  Way on track.  I had a fabulous week of eating and exercising and it paid off.  For those of you that do Weight Watchers I use the Activelink to track my daily activity.  Over the last week I racked up 35 extra activity points.  I ended up using all but 1 point of those extra's and NONE of the 49 extra points for the week - which was my goal.

A few weeks ago I changed how eTools takes my "extra" points out because I wanted to get to the point where I wasn't using the 49 extra points during the week and only use those points that I earned.  So it now takes the activity points before the weekly allowance points.  Some people don't ever want to touch the points they earn and they use the 49 points for the week - but I was using both (plus some in most cases), so I needed to figure out a better system for me.  I'm not saying that this will always work, because I was able to get some really good days of exercising in where it was basically the whole day - and that rarely happens.  But it worked for me this week.

For the last two weeks I've gained... one week was .4 the next was 3.8 (last week).  I knew why I gained for both of those weeks and it was well deserved and well worth it to me :)  I got a lot of cravings out of the way :)  But  I knew I needed to get back on track... I mean I can't throw all my hard work down the drain AND honestly - I feel so much better when I eat healthier (we all do).  So this week, I lost what I've gained over the last two weeks PLUS some!  My weight loss this week was 7.6 lbs, for a total of 84.8 lbs now.  I will have to work super hard again this week to even lose .2 (since this week's loss was soooo big).  It can be done - I know it and I'm going to prove it!

It's CRAZY - just to think a little of a year ago I was carrying around that much weight.  Miserable, depressed, not wanting to do things.!!  It was affecting my friendships, my relationship with my husband, myself, just EVERYTHING!

I couldn't walk up and down our stairs without being winded (it was so embarrassing because I knew why, but hoped that my husband didn't get it).  I had to hoist myself out of our furniture because I couldn't get up like a normal person.  I couldn't make dinner without having to sit down in between (if I was chopping up a bunch of stuff) because my back would hurt sooo bad!  I made all kinds of fattening/yummy food because I thought that would make my husband happier.  It didn't.

I have to say he NEVER once said anything to me about my weight, not once!  If I asked him to help me watch what I'm eating he would do it... and then I'd resent him for it.  I'd get mad, he'd sense it and then he'd stop... and I'd put back on the weight I'd lose AND THEN SOME.  It was crazy.

When we met I was much thinner, very willing to go do things and try new things... but over those years (7 years) I gained so much weight that I stopped wanting to go places, do things and some of those things I really enjoyed doing too!  It was just so uncomfortable for me to do them now.  I don't know the exact amount of weight I gained with him but I know it was over 100 lbs.  I'm guessing at saying it was about 125-130.  I started thinking "how could he still love me when I'm that big?"

We had our problems, that's for sure.  But we got through them, then came other dynamics into the mix.  I am choosing not to share those because it's very private and I know those involved would NOT want this public - but it was extremely hard on us.  There was tension caused in our relationship by others and it made me even more depressed.  The deeper and deeper I got depressed... the more I'd eat!  We all go through family/personal things that we let affect us in different ways and mine was to eat my way into happiness... which would last seconds.  Then I'd be miserable.

Anyway if you read my 1 year mark post, you'll see my tipping point.  The picture is outrageous and people don't even think it looks like me and don't remember me being that big... the picture is worth a thousand words!  That's for sure.

I hope you're not going through the same thing as I did, but if you are you must know that there's hope.  You must find that inspiration, motivation, desire and will power.  If you do, you will be a success.  Make sure to set goals for yourself to work towards... I know when I don't have a goal to work towards I tend to slack a little... saying I'm in no hurry.  Which is true really ( I don't want the weight to fall off - I want to work for it so I can always remember how miserable I was, how hard it was and that I don't want to do this again) but I am they type of person that has to have goals!!!  Thank the Lord that eating healthy feels good!!!

I can't wait until I'm Healthfully Ever After!